How camper Lauren’s life changed

Have you ever stopped to think what life would be like if it didn’t always go as planned? What if something drastic happened to you or a loved one, something so unexpected that it almost made you feel as if you were drowning in the situation, gasping for air because the pain and the realization was just too overwhelming? Have you ever thought how the small words are the ones that can change your life so completely? Cancer - this was the only word I needed. Such a small word, yet it brought such an immeasurable impact to me, my family and friends - my life. Everything that I had built for myself, growing up, shattered at this point, when the doctor revealed the horrible truth. I was only just eleven – still a child. Yet on December 23, 2000, that child was quickly forced to realize and accept what was being told to her. There was no possibility of escaping it. I had cancer.

I had been experiencing extremely abnormal bruising and little red dots that continued to reappear on my skin, so that morning I went to the walk-in clinic up on the corner by my house, then to the hospital in Oakville for further testing and X-rays, and then by ambulance to the Hospital for Sick Children in Toronto. It was unbeknownst to me that this place was soon going to become like a second home. By the time that I had reached the hospital, the cancer cells had literally taken over my blood. So how is a young girl to cope – not only with the realization that her life is one big question from here on out, but also with the realization that her chances of survival are 10% below the average survival rate? The nurses and doctors at Sick Kids are what I like to consider miracle workers. What they do everyday is certainly not to be underestimated. They gave me the best possible care that they could, and my family and friends were always right by my side, holding my hand every step of the way. However, did they always really understand? They had never lost their hair – three times. They were never put on drugs which constantly changed their physical appearances. They didn’t have to continuously be treated and poked at by the nurses and doctors for a constant three years during a five year protocol. And mostly, they didn’t have to deal with the confusion, the anger, the pain and sickness. Sometimes I felt like a stranger standing behind a glass wall looking in at a life that should have continued to be mine.

It wasn’t until I came to Camp Oochigeas for the first time in the summer of 2001, that I discovered that I was not alone in how I felt. I discovered that there were other children – both younger and older than me, who understood exactly what I was going through. At first when the idea of camp was brought up to me at home my initial reaction was not to go. I didn’t want to be separated from my family for a whole two weeks. But my parents seemed to think that this was a good idea and after much convincing I decided to go. Now when I look back, I think to my self how in the world could I possibly have said no? It is at this place, nestled in the woods of the Rosseau area, where my life finally started to get back on track again. After coming home from those first two weeks, I was a different girl. I was much more like my old self before I had gotten sick, yet I was a little bit braver and daring, a little bit stronger, and a little more outgoing. Camp taught me to laugh out loud again, to smile again, and to accept my cancer for what it was and to realize that I was still me – and that that would never change.

I never realized that the people at camp and the activities there could be as healing to the campers as the medicine that we required. There are activities everyday designed to push our boundaries and to help us break through that glass wall that so many of us were still standing behind. Activities such as waterskiing, rock climbing, canoeing and kayaking, sports, arts & crafts, drama, and so much more. Every year I was placed in a cabin group with girls who were my own age, and with volunteer counsellors who sometimes acted our age. There were cabin groups for junior boys and girls, intermediates, and seniors as well. Camp is really just a place to forget your everyday life and to remember what it is like to be a kid again. The motto at camp is “You have only failed if you have failed to try. Act as if it were impossible, and it will be.” These words to me are so true.

So many people look at a child with cancer and see someone so different from them. Yet we as campers do not look at each other as “different”, but merely as children who have been given an obstacle in life. Some are able to overcome this obstacle, while others are not. I have met so many friends who have helped to share my healing, however they have also had to help me cope with the pain of losing not only fellow campers, but friends.

The summer that my friend and cabin-mate passed away was a new summer for camp. With every end there is a new beginning, and for camp the new beginning was a permanent home. Not only did Ooch have a new site filled with new adventure and hope, but a new session had been added. 7SCAPE: a week for just teens in the end of August. But I believe that this year, during the summer of 2005, was the year that I truly appreciated all that camp was. This past summer, another new session was added to camp – Temoul, a special session for children who have lost siblings to cancer. Camp Ooch again opened its welcoming arms to those needing to cope. This year I decided to go to 7SCAPE for a change, I was nervous about going to a new session at first but I knew other campers there from previous years, so I certainly was not alone - although alone is a concept which is unfathomable at camp. I was part of the CHILL cabin group this year. Every cabin group was named after one of the elements needed to enjoy camp. There was Chill, Connect, Think, Stretch, Emerge and Escape. I had an amazing cabin group this year and even though 7SCAPE was only a week, I immediately new that this was going to be the best week of my summer.

This year, the spirit of camp seemed to have had a whole new meaning to me. I undertook challenges that I probably would never have taken, even during my previous years as a camper. But mainly, this year was all about having as much fun as possible, and enjoying my precious days at camp. I took part in some crazy things this summer with my friends, such as canoeing backwards to our overnight location on Ooch’s private lake – a trip which should have taken about 10 minutes, but ended up taking close to 40. Also, that same night, myself and three other girls went canoeing in one boat, standing up with lifejackets being worn in the style of bottoms rather than tops. I became a VIP member for the camp’s own Beach Club Dance, and also I witnessed a Chicken McNugget eating contest, coming to the final number of 55 nuggets. I overcame my fear of heights, and not only climbed, but jumped off of the 35 ft. tree pole on the high ropes course. I even managed to get a total of 5 hours sleep during a 48 hour time period. This is only part of the crazy life at camp.

Yet, when I stop and think about it, none of these experiences would have happened in my life, and I would have never met any of the amazing people that I have, if I had never gotten sick. So was my cancer really such the curse that I had made it out to be in the beginning? For a while, the answer was yes. But Camp Oochigeas turned this thought around.

Thank You.

Other Experiences

“It’s the most amazing experience talking to other teenagers your age and learning from them how to deal with your problems. Ooch is the only place where I’m able to connect to other kids without feeling out of place or awkward.”